why do we shop?

one reason for embarking on a year of no new stuff is my growing need to resist the crescendo of society's strongest current: crazyhyperspazconsumptionmania.

it's exhausting when ads shout at you from the billboard to the bathroom stall. to be constantly told you're incomplete. and though i love the gentle serenity of christmas morning, december's also a particularly striking reminder of just how crucial buying stuff has come to be, just how much meaning we've allowed it to have in our most intimate relationships.

this would all be very jolly and joyous if constant consuming made us happy. but it doesn't. it doesn't because shopping is predicated on the idea that something is missing, i'm not quite good enough yet. so i go shopping. fine, but now i've created an association in my brain between feeling incomplete and enlisting "things" to help me. how can the experience not be tinted with anxiety? and what if i shop for 19 hours straight and never find anything i really like?

we shop because shopping offers us a possible self. it offers us quick and easy access to who we could be. it tempts us with transformation. it tempts us with a self of the future, one who's better-looking, more organized, cleaner, trendier, healthier, smarter, less bored, more fun.

sometime last year, my cousin-in-law jen and i walked into ikea. we agreed it was one of the greatest, most exhilarating feelings ever experienced by man. after talking a bit longer, we nailed down why: ikea offers you hope that you can get literally your shit together. you could be so organized, you'll have your socks in alphabetical order. ikea sells us a way to organize external clutter, and we presume that the organization of internal clutter will follow.

ads for "stuff" prey on a very deep need to assert an identity. the best part? you can have billions of new identities over a lifetime. any moment could be a new beginning. it's 6:12 on a monday night. i could go right now to the eaton centre and within five minutes, instantly become someone who listens to gangsta rap. someone who has blond highlights. someone who reads science fiction. someone different. someone new. we learn who we are through what we consume.

and shopping can be sweet, because if you're feeling dissatisfied with who you are, it's never too late to start again. and all you have to do is part with a little money. seems like an OK deal.